Experience of Kundalini Awakening and Cosmic Consciousness
I was in India for my second time at the Oneness University. I was not really sure what I was doing there. Only 3 weeks before there was the sudden decision to go. I was not expecting anything. Just sitting next to the wall in the room quietly meditating.
A Dasa (monk) came into the room wearing yellow pants and shirt. The other Dasas were helping him sit down. It was obvious he was in a very high state. This monk in yellow was to give us deeksha, place his hands on our head and transfer his enlightened energy to us in the room.
One by one people were led up to the monk. Finally it was my turn. His hands on my head. I felt the energy but nothing intense. I had no expectations, I was content no matter what happened. .
I was led back to my spot where I lied down on my back. I lied there in a meditative state. Eventually, we were told we could get up and go to lunch when we felt like it. I stayed for a while afterward, enjoying my state of awareness. Nothing big happening. An intense amount of energy in the third eye (just between and slightly above the eyebrows) so that there was pain there. I had experienced this thousands of times before so was not surprised and simply watched the energy move.
Finally I got up and very slowly walked towards the dining hall. I walked along the dusty dirt rode on the side of the campus, still watching this intensity in my third eye. It was sunny and a typical South Indian hot day where it feels as though you are walking in a big clay oven.
Suddenly, my slow walking came to a halt. There was something peculiar. I could not figure out what was different, but something was different. As I could not tangibly notice anything, I continued to walk. This happened a few times, stopping, noticing something out of the ordinary but could not figure out what.
But after the third time, I took a slow step forward with my right foot and it felt as though my foot went right through the solid ground. And in that step, rushes of bliss rose up my leg and up through my entire body then out of the top of my head.
I stood there absolutely lost in incredible ecstasy. My next step with my left foot minutes later, the same. Bliss gushing through my body with every step.
I stopped. I could hear 360 degrees around me. Not with my ears but with my entire body. Every sound passed through me in bliss, all of it merging together. Like liquid through liquid, or air through air. It was orgasmic. Every sound, everything I saw moved right through me in an ecstatic wave of bliss. Everything moving through everything.
At times I was laughing in hysterics, the next moment in absolute stillness. Lost in the awe of everything moving through everything. The sound of the birds singing rushed through me in ecstasy. Then the next moment completely lost in the beauty of an insect walking on the ground, it's every footstep was my footstep in absolute bliss.
I wrote afterward:
"Everything that moved, moved through me, as me as bliss. All definitions gone. All objects, even the "I" had no definition, it is all one. All divine. Divine bliss moving through divine bliss for the sheer delight of it all. Everything I saw was complete, was totality. Ants walking around were totality.
I was the moment, no separation, nothing else there but the experience in that moment. Then attention moved to something else, and that was totality. The words kept repeating "I am everything moving."
There were bursts of uncontrolled laughter, then absolute stillness, the complete dissolution of any form, and just - what to call it? It had no name - the totality - that is as close as I can come. There was no "me", just the totality of the moment.
I did not want to eat, fearing the food would lessen the state. But by the time I made it to lunch (everyone had already left) and sat down to eat, every bit of food was divine. Every bite would take me higher, dissolving again and again in the totality. The food on my spoon was alive, aware, loving me, as me. So much laughter, so much bliss. Everything so funny, so un- serious, just a big cosmic joke.
After lunch, I went over to the trash bin and dish bin to sort out my dishes and scraps. But I could not move, just stood there in front of the garbage bin laughing for half an hour. Energy moving so powerfully through my arms I was shaking.
I finally managed to put away my dishes and sat back down in the empty dining hall. A fly came and landed on my arm, looking at me and I at him. He flew up and tapped me on the third eye and then flew back to my other arm. Then again, flew up and tapped me on the third eye and flew back to my other arm. Over and over the fly did this. I was completely engrossed in every movement.
Walking back on the side path, so engrossed in every blade of grass, every insect, the wind, the heat. Every experience was totality. I don't know why but I bent down and drew a smiley face in the sand. It was alive, radiating joy and all I could do was laugh. I drew another and another. So much laughter. Life was a funny farm - a farm of funnies!
I could have spent the rest of my life on that side path. I felt I would be happy to live right there on that dusty road for the rest of my life. But then I heard this beautiful music and followed it to a man sitting on a chair on the lawn playing his guitar.
I laid down on my back by his feet on the lawn. Every musical note like divine ecstasy moving through me and as me. One breath I was laughing in hysterics, the next absolutely sobbing in unconditional love.
At some points, I would dissolve into stillness and had the experience of shooting up out of my body through my third eye into space like a bottle rocket and became everything at once. And there was a message, saying I was to love everyone as totality. I was to serve totality and love as totality. I could experience all and everything at once. But that does not really say it.
It was so much joy, the shakti was so intense and I was laughing so hard that I had to put my hands over my eyes because it felt as though my eyeballs would pop out. I could really feel them pressing against my hands about to pop out! (Yes, I know, eyeballs don't pop out but that was the experience!)
The guitar player stopped playing and left but I remained lying there. I knew it was already past time to go to the next session. Yet also felt that the state would diminish when I entered a room full of people. I considered to just stay there on the grass. There was a lovely stray dog that came over and lied down next to me and we stayed like that together in bliss. It was absolutely beautiful. But then I felt it would be disrespectful to skip the session so I went.
I went to my room to get my toothbrush first and saw a name tag with "Kip Mazuy" on it. Somewhere in the mind was the info that supported that that was my name yet I knew there was no "Kip Mazuy."
The body took a while to recover from the energy that went through me that day. The intense shakti that moved through me seemed to fry every energy pathway in my body.
I also want to note here that I had not taken any drugs, herbs, supplements, layhems, nothing. It really showed me what was possible.
Oneness University and outside villages. The bottom right corner is the dusty path where it happened.
Looking outside of Oneness University
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